Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Why can't some people keep their thoughts shoved in their mind?

Yes, I send my baby to a daycare
No, I cannot afford to stay at home
Yes, she has already fallen sick twice
No, I cannot afford a nanny

Great, if you can afford a nanny and keep your child protected...

So please don't tell me or anyone what they should do with their child or children or how they should lead their life. Keep it in your mind that you are no great person to judge any of us about what we do with our child or children. If you are happy with you are arrangement I am happy for you and no doubt sometimes feel a bit jealous that your child is at a better place than mine but what can I do about that...such is life...so please understand my feelings and stop flaunting the great lifestyle you are proving your child with.

I am tired of listening to what you think is the correct way of raising a child...if that is your opinion is respect it and I certainly will try to take the good out of it...but let it stop with that don't get condescending and tell me that what I am doing is wrong...who the hell gave you the right to do so?

Also, if I want to hang out with my husband an evening (not yet but in the future) and leave my baby at an extended care center I do not see why it is any of your business to tell me that it is right or wrong. If you don't want to do it...I am happy for your child but that does not give you the right to judge me or my family.

The ultimate thing is how our child grows up and we will know that only in another sixteen or eighteen years...lets make all these judgments as to who is a better parent then.

Thank you!

13 comments:

Megha Bansal said...

wow! feisty aren't we today?

i think u needed to be heard and that's why this out pour.

I feel bad, and i am sure what/how you do things is good. so why worry. Sanjana will grow up to be one strong, sensible, passionate (like her mom) and beautiful girl. so don't worry :)

Anu Russell said...

thank you so much sweetheart!!!

Ya...some people dont have to try hard to piss me off!

Janani said...

Good post Anu. I can relate to all the interfering and comments that start pouring in from all corners..!!! Hope this post puts some ppl into a thinking mode..(if at all they do that)..Take care. Im sure you would be a wonderful Mom with your beautiful personality..!

Anu Russell said...

thanks janani...

Trevor Penn said...

Hi Anu,

First off, i hope baby Sanj has recovered. Cute pic you put up. To tell you the truth, she is the more beautiful one even though she gets her genes from you. :P

Second, I am sorry that some doting-narrowsighted-mother(?) necessitated this outburst of yours. IMHO, there is no absolute measure of a good parent. You do what you think is the best for your li'l angel and stay convinced. As simple as that.

And oh, just to put things in perspective, i can tell you for sure that i've heard of a nanny running away with a baby but i've never for once heard horror stories of/about/at day care centers. :)

Anu Russell said...

hey shank

thank you so much...I am literally trying my best and struggling between work and baby so much that my guilt does not give me enough sleep and loads of creepy dreams and then i have to hear such comments!

Hopefully she will be an angel when she grows up...just like her mom :)

and btw why u taking punches at my looks babu? enti idhi behavior?

Trevor Penn said...

hehehe... your telugu is cute. :-)

Anu Russell said...

really? the first one to say so...most of my golt friends start dissecting it and tell me that mine is not good telugu and then we get into an argument...hehehehe...thanks :)

aruljohn said...

Ah, you put your thoughts in a relatively polite way. I'd have been a little more crass if I were you. I'm getting fed up with all the "suggestions" and "are you going to be a father soon?" crap that some people keep bringing up EVERYTIME my wife and I meet them in a party or function.

Why can't people mind their own bloody business and worry about their own problems instead of throwing their free suggestions and constant querying about the family way all the time? Yeah, some think I'm snobbish for ignoring their questions, well, let them. And you can do the same with those who try to push their family rearing procedures onto you, Anu!

Anu Russell said...

the minute you tell anyone you are pregnant you get 1000's of opinions/ideas/suggestions...but i am sure they do it in good humor...but then there are ones that are mean and try to compare your kid with theirs or their way of doing things and at the same time telling u that you are doing something wrong...those annoy me the most...

i have to write a separate blog about one more issue that pissed me off while i was pregnant...maybe today during lunch.

on the other hand i agree with what you are telling

Kavita said...

awwww ... hope sanjana feels better soon.. I know its difficult being a mother and have to work...as well.. being a mother does not mean you have to sacrifice every single desire.. so life life king size.. rather queen size anu... and (not telling you what to do..) teach your daughter to live life king aize as well.. :)

BangaloreMom said...

Hi Anu

Thanks for visiting my blog. I have not read all ur posts yet but am getting there. But about this post, this is what I have to say. There are people who will ALWAYS judge you, no matter what!! They will judge you if you leave your child in daycare today. The same person will criticise you for leaving a child with a nanny without batting an eyelash the next time they meet you. I think thats a part of mommyhood. The part that drives you up the wall, no doubt. The trick to beating them at their own game is to agree with EVERYTHING they tell you and NEVER argue. Dont bother wasting your breath. Anyways, I am sure you fended more than adequately for yourslef!!

Anu Russell said...

Kavita

Thank you so much...yup will definitely do that :)

Bangalore Mom...

I agree with you...no point wasting time talking to these people...I don't mind getting advices at all...it is just the comparison and such that pisses me off!