Nothingness...leads to a lot of BS

I had this window open for a while. Each topic I think of writing feels combative. This is not the only reason for the existence of the blog - to complain about people or their habits. I want it to be more of a place where my daughter can come back and read about her mom, her life, things I have not had a chance to share with her yet. But some days I feel like this is more of a rant space. A space where I can bitch about people with a veil. A vent space that all of us sometimes need. I am glad I have this venue, a place where I can secretly complain and hope that the person I am complaining about reads and gets the hint. It some how misses the mark almost all of the time though 😋

The weather outside is pretty cold and rainy, has been raining for two days straight, feels like I live in Seattle. The thing about rainy weather is that it is cozy, it should be enjoyed from within the sheets of your bedroom, with a hot cuppa chai and some hot pakoda that was cooked by someone other than you. A snuggle, some TV, a sippa chai would be perfect. But if you look at it from the window of your office, it is lonely, gloomy, and very depressing. If you have not seen the sun three days in a row, it can get boring too. And this is Texas weather we are talking about, a lot of rain almost always equals with hail, tornadoes, or just high speed winds, so we are on the constant look out.

S and us have started to do fun stuff on the weekends. Things that she enjoys with us. One weekend the two of us played badminton for almost an hour and had the best time doing so. One weekend G brought her biking to visit me at the gym while I was trying to fake work out. It was such a pleasant surprise to see them both all happy and smiles. She biked 4 miles that day. She also ran with me, or rather ahead of me 3 miles once. We are trying to do random physical activity with her to keep her fit while she is going through so many down days at tennis due to the weather outside. She loves her tennis, she loves it enough to want to play it for fun. She is not much into competition, she tells me that she just does not feel it in her to compete in sports. She enjoys hitting with us and her coach but that is it. I am happy that she has a good knack at raquet sports. She picked up badminton in 3 minutes of trying to figure out what to hit and where.

Oh well! I had nothing to write and then a lot of something to say. There is a lot more stuff where this came from and hopefully I will be able to pull them out one at a time!

Pensive ART

Shed!

All other kids posed for their parents in front of the school sign, in the parking lot, at the door to the school, in their classroom, everywhere. Mine, well, did not. She refused to smile for the camera and kept looking away every time I begged her for a pose. I was that miserable parent you see running around with her phone ready to snap a shot and missing completely. G stood smirking at my "typical" mom behavior. Both him and S laughed at me while I was not looking. Oh! Well!

As I was about to head out I saw another parent, S's friend's mom, standing teary eyed at the door to their classroom. She was gushing to another mom saying how the kid has grown up and she was not ready for this. I literally touched my cheeks...nothing...no moisture. "Bad Mom" moment...I looked around and saw several other moms doing the same thing...shedding tears...and me...dry like a desert.

I walked away wondering why I did not feel these emotions. I was sad to see her start her next grade but not really sad to see her grow up. As long as she is growing up positively and healthily, who am I to complain? I justified it in my head and walked to the car. I still could not get over it.

I kept mulling about it over and over in my head, am I a bad mom because I did not feel any sadness enough to cry? I thought about it hard and realized that I have never cried at good bye's. The one time I was close to crying was when I left my parents house after a really wonderful summer break. I did not cry during my kinder drop off, or when I left my home country to come to another country. It dawned on me that I lack the emotion and just like me so did G. The image of S shooing me away and going to her desk begging me not to embarrass her came to my head. She sat down at her assigned spot and never once looked back. This was her, from kinder to now...just like mom and dad...she was one of us, the kind that does not look back after saying bye.

Thanks for reading!
A-non-Shedding ART

With Age Comes...

Maturity??? Ya right. I remember being mature at 18 when I had to choose a career path, at 22 when I had to choose my university abroad, at 25 a life partner and at 29 a name for my baby. They happened, just like that. If I remember correctly, I put minimum effort into any of those. Everything just fell into place and I just had to walk the talk.

At 36, I have done so much in my life past that I can actually look back and call out incidents by the year and sometimes even month. I always wondered how my grand relatives did that. I remember a grand uncle telling me a story about how he was just-out-of-teenage boy on a ship going to a concentration camp in Poland as a POW. He had the exact date, number of people aboard, and the weather conditions detailed out to us. I could not even remember what I had for dinner the previous night. I have surely matured now, because I can say I how sad I felt leaving India on the 4th of July 2000 to come to US or how I felt after I graduated in 2002 unsure of what lied ahead.

None of these came to my head until I got into bed last night and G asked me to massage his tennis elbow. I refused saying that my hand was hurting and so was my ankle. We both laughed, "we are falling apart, one thing at a time." This morning I walked into my closet and saw that we had collected every sort of brace that is available in the market. There were two knee braces, two ankle braces, two compression bands, one arm brace, and two back braces. They all lay there thrown together for the emergency situation, which unfortunately seemed to happen more often that we would like. It just confirmed, that we were breaking down, one joint at a time. Both G and I have used all the braces at least once in the past 3 to 4 months.

So, I guess, with age comes maturity but before that you fall apart.

From
Aged ART

Travel Time - Page 7

The La Reve show we saw at Wynn was something special. I have never been to any of them ever before and just the set was spectacular for starters. Later as the show began we had our mouths open for most of the time. People going in and out of the pool that seemed to be going in and out too. People jumping from 30' with no protection into water and starting to dance. Amazing! We thoroughly enjoyed it as we headed back to spend our last day in luxury before we drove off from Vegas the following morning.

By this time, typically people with flu would have recovered but since G and I both drugged ourselves to heal, we were still sick. On and off fatigue and weakness and fever with cough and cold. We did not want to give up. Our from S was also falling sick but he braved on too. There were two healthy people in the car as we headed to Sedona.

The drive was spectacular. I bugged G into driving us to Hoover Dam. He sulked as we had already seen it but I persisted. Babs and I quickly walked up to the dam, took photos and got back into the car. By the time we reached our hotel in Sedona it was dark. The drive down through the mountains was scary but S drove really well and took us to our rooms safely.

The hotel itself is another story. It was adobe, red floor, quaint and picturesque. From outside our rooms we could see the red hills. There was a courtyard and a cute little restaurant. We ate dinner and heard a local musician sing. He got fascinated by the little monkey Babs and dedicated songs for her. We danced with our spouses and Babs. It was romantic and cozy.

The following day we woke up late, relaxed, ate breakfast in a cute little restaurant and headed out to see FL Wright's church Chapel of the Holy Cross in Sedona. It was a hike and we did it enjoying the view all the way up and down. G and I declared that we would consider Sedona in our list of top 10 places to settle. So far Goa is the only other place on the list.

We followed our church walk with a visit to the Amitabha Stupa. It was peaceful. We sat down there in silence for quite a bit as Babs played with the glass stones, collecting them and dispersing them. She was in her element being a kid while the adults sat down and thought about life as it stood till that day. There is something peaceful about anything Buddhist.

We ate some local ice cream in the cold and Babs and I got to play some wind instruments in the Sedona main road. It was super fun. Later that night, we headed back to our rooms, changed and enjoyed dinner at the hotel restaurant again. There was a jazz musician there that night. Before we headed to our rooms my girlfriend S and I danced Bangra to Jazz and ran out of the restaurant giggling like little girls. We could not believe that we had started off dancing nicely and then suddenly decided it was time to add the Indian flavor into Sedona! ha!

Last night in Sedona before we headed to New Mexico. The vacation was winding down but none of us felt better health wise. The spirits were up but the spirits we bought from Dallas was still in the sacks as none of us were in the mood to get drunk while loaded up on fever meds and antibiotics...

Love
Sickly ART

Travel Time - Page 5

The following couple of days we chilled at home. All of us trying to get over whatever we were suffering. We saw a few movies at home, ate out quite a bit and the kids played and fought enough too. We had the gifts wrapped and on the 25th morning the kids woke up to see that Santa had indeed delivered. There were all sorts of goodies and the entire day passed on playing with them. That night, I did laundry and packed for yet another road adventure. We were still coughing, sniffling and feverish but the trip had to go on.

The following morning we ate a heavy breakfast and set out on the road once again. This time going south and east towards Vegas! The drive was uneventful, thankfully. The last time we did the same drive we were stuck in traffic for four hours en route. We stopped at a gas station to get Babs lunch and it took me 20 minutes to get out with McD's kids meal for her. I was exhausted. There are far a few exits on this route and each one was filled to the brim with hungry and weary travelers.

We drove through the dust bowl and then through the Nevadan dessert onto Death Valley. Everything looked beautiful to me. The barren mountains to the windmills dotting them along the way, the cacti and the thorny bushes, the brown soil that changed over to red and the hills that were now dotted with dark green shrubs everywhere. There were miles of nothingness that we drove through, at certain times, we were the lone travelers on the road. We kept an eye on the gas tank and our water resources.

G and I had our first fight on the trip, he would not let me drive. He wanted to control the driving. Every time he would let me drive, it was closer to dusk and I was not comfortable to do so. It was also about the time Babs started asking me to sit back with her so she could lie down to fall asleep. This time I would have none of it and threw a hissy fit. We yelled at each other and then calmed down, laughed at ourselves and exchanged seats. This was also the only time that we almost died, thanks to my skills.

Finally, the lights of the never sleeping city came up in the horizon. We were happy. We were going to get a break and also meet our BFF's there who had already checked in and also seen a David Copperfield show and were now waiting for us to have dinner with us.

We got there, excited, happy, screaming in joy. We had booked in out favorite hotel yet again, Trump. It has a kitchenette and we love the idea of cooking breakfast and heating up milk for Babs at our own will. The one time we stayed at Venetian, I had to go to the Starbucks on the casino floor to get the milk warmed, and I hated that.

Once we checked in, we realized that we were all too tired to step out. So we ordered in some slight refreshments and hit the bed early. Looked like either we had infected SC or he was already on the verge of falling sick.

We shut the blinds to turn away the brightness of the city from coming into our room on the 22nd floor. The view was spectacular but we had to get some rest.

Vegas Baby! Not that we are big gamblers but we like going there!

Love
A Not-S0-Gambling ART

Travel Time - Page 4

We woke up for a good breakfast in San Francisco and then took a nap. All of us. Apparently everyone in CA were also going through a bout of flu. It was a flu-filled family. Once awake and fresh we headed to a local coffee shop to have some scones and tea and listen to some good live music. The day came to a quick end as everyone wanted to rest before the trip.

We packed up, loaded tons of food again and warm clothes and headed towards the beach. We reached the place where we did the Seal Walk. It was a 3 mile walk on a sandy beach seeing the seals come in and do their thing. The timing was perfect, we saw elephant seals up close about 3 feet away from us. They were tired after their long journey and were resting. Some were violent but most were just tired. Some photos and we headed back to the car. It was a beautiful day. Perfect to do the outdoorsy stuff.

From the seals we headed to the Piece De Resistance. A youth hostel besides a light house. It was beautiful, picturesque. Often time we have wondered why we never bothered, but this time we were the lucky ones. We shared a three bedroom house with 10 other guests. Our room had three bunk beds for the six of us. We settled in, more photo ops by the setting sun, the light house, the ocean, more seals. It was perfect. After dinner at a local fare, which was uber gourmet, we headed back to the lighthouse to see the stars. There were billions of them in the sky that night. We could keep staring at them for hours on end. The cold got to us, so we got back in and relaxed in the bunk bed. Babs, me and G, shared one bed so the sleep was tight but we slept nevertheless.

We had to leave the wonderful hostel and go back to the city the following day. We were definitely not excited. We re-packed and took more photos by the succulent cliffs and stopped at a beach as the kids begged us. The water was cold but not cold enough to stop the kids from getting in. The waves played tricks and even a few adults got wet by accident. I stood above and took photos with my zoom lens. I was not about to get my shoes or clothes sandy and nasty.

It was sad saying bye to the water but the kids all shivering got cozy in the back of the car again and started playing games as we headed into San Fran. We had to do the view point at the Bath house and the Golden Gate Bridge that we never missed. So far, the past four times we had had perfect sighting and we did not want to jinx that. The Sutro bath house was glistening in the sun as we took more pictures, sorted some fights between the kids and headed towards the Golden Gate.

We walked the bridge, and then drove up the mountains. Perfect. We were all beat and tired. The kids wanted food and we wanted rest. The windows were down because two of us wanted to throw up, one of us was pregnant (not me). So back at home, we rested while the men went and picked up dinner. I remember vaguely seeing some movie before sleeping on the couch itself.

All of us were beat!

Love
A Tired ART

Travel Time - Page 3

Early in the morning, I was up. I got ready, packed up and sat down to write down all the happenings thus far while Babs and G were still snoring. As soon as they were up, we ate the last bits of the food we had packed for the trip and left to see the Arches. We were the first ones to arrive at the Park, the guard informed us. In Utah, we have been pleasantly surprised at how nice the Guards at the National Park were. They were very friendly and super nice to us and explained all the million questions we had.

Going up the mountains, there was snow everywhere. It was like being atop Mount Kailasa, I thought. So beautiful. We stopped by a lot of the arches and took photos but could not hike. We were lazy and we did not have much time in our hands. We did the roundabout drive, marveled at the beauty and the dangers we had to drive through to see some of these natural wonders. There was ice on the road, snow on the steep cliff like sides but we made it back to the road in one piece. As we were heading out hoards of tourists were climbing up the path we had seen. I was happy that we had finished seeing the beauty in privacy.

From there on, we knew we had to be in San Francisco by the following morning. We started our drive coming down the Rockies. The beauty of these roads cannot be explained in words, they need to be experienced. We drove besides brooks, tracks, cliffs and nothingness. There was thick dense fog and all of a sudden bright sun light. We were up in the mountains and then in flat ground. There was snow everywhere and not a drop of precipitation anywhere. We could not get enough of it.

At lunch time Babs suggested Desi food. G obliged and we hunted down one in Salt Lake City. It was good to eat fresh, hot Desi food. After hogging down the buffet, Babs and I relaxed in the back seat while G drove. The road was a straight black line with miles and miles of white pure snow on either side. It was difficult to stay awake. I got up and sat next to G talking to him and keeping him company. As we got closer to Nevada the snow seemed to disappear giving way to the open barrenness of the Nevadas. Every time we climbed up the hills, there would be snow and on the descent we would drive through normalcy. Prius was rocking it.

After all, the Prius was on a pilgrimage. That is what G and I called it at least. Prius was going to see other awesome Prius'es at San Fran - the home or Prius and tree huggers. Eventually about two hours to midnight we were in the Sierra Nevada mountains. It was big, scary and shone white in the moonlight glistening with snow everywhere. I had been warned of her and I prayed to let us pass through peacefully. And so we did. Not a single stop or scare, we were into the Valley. An hour past mid night we were drinking wine and sitting with family who mentioned to us more than once, "You guys did it! But you are nuts!"

I agree, "we are nuts" to have driven so far with the most happy little girl ever. We fought for the camera usage and that is all. She ate snacks from the snack pack on her own, and napped on her own. She was allowed one hour of TV time every day after dark and before sleep and she used it wisely. She drew sketches and wrote her diary sitting in the back. She did not throw any tantrums and reinforced to us that she was the awesomest little traveler ever!

Love
ART

Travel Time - Page 2

We were on the road sniffling, sneezing, coughing and doing the "ayoo," "amma." all the way out of Texas seeing the tumbleweeds cross our path often times. Babs took a nice long nap and was ready to see the Texas country side disappearing into the early winter darkness. We stopped for dinner and Babs got her hour long movie time which had the car illuminated as we drove through pitch darkness otherwise into New Mexico (State #2).

On our way family from CA called and suggested that the weather going north seemed fine and that we should take a break at Farmington, NM for the night. It was another 500 miles away and we drove through the night to Albuquerque to Santa Fe and then through some real wilderness into Farmington. En route we saw snow and ice accumulation but nothing else. We were not sure if we were on plains or on mountains.

We took a break at Farmington around 3.30am local time which was 4.30am Dallas time. We had been driving for some 15 plus hours. Sanjana was in deep sleep when we checked into a hotel and hit the sack hard.

The next morning we were up early, by 7.00am and we were out after breakfast and cleaning up at 9.00am. On the road the family suggested we do Monument Valley which was not a long drive and then settle for the night at Moab. We thought it was a fine decision, from having no plans, we actually had one now. So we drove through some of the most beautiful landscape ever seen. It was red, brown, little trees, actually no tress just shrubs and bare and yet beautiful. I told myself that this is probably how moon or mars would look. the rock formations were amazing, Babs and I played the "what does this rock look like to you" game. It was fun and thrilling.

We realized that on the small state route we were driving, if you saw a Cop car drive up on your side of the road, it meant pull over out of the road as a vehicle carrying a big pipe wider than one lane was coming up and it will not stop for you. We learnt it after the first cop gave us the glaring for a life time.

We stopped to have lunch at a small town. We still had the home packed lunch, so G and I ate that while Babs enjoyed some fast food and then we headed into Utah (State #3).

We got to the entrance of Monument Valley and took the wrong turn and drove through some more wilderness. We realized that we were not on track when the road abruptly came to an end. So we lugged ourselves back to the right place and words cannot describe the beauty that only nature can create. We decided to brave the drive on the untamed terrain in our cute little Prius who was awesome. She can do everything a normal car can do. After some photo shoot we headed back out and started our journey towards Moab.

Family in CA booked our stay for the night there and we settled into the hotel room before heading out for dinner. We wanted to eat some fresh dinner, and what more to remind us of home than a Mexican restaurant. Of course Mexican in Utah tasted different and we missed the Tex-Mex. Babs and G shared a bed because Amma dead was too tired and slept by 8.30pm while daddy-daughter saw some TV before calling it a night.

We were scheduled to see The Arches National Park the next morning.

Love
A Weary Amma!

Travel Time - Page 1

This post is written in the hopes of retaining some memories from all the fun things we did in December. I will post in several chapters or episodes depending on time and life.

We had a plan. A Plan to take a vacation but we were not sure what to do. We had 15 days in hand and all the tickets to fly out of the country were out of our budget. We still wanted to hang out as a family and do something fun that was not at home. We decided that we will put our Prius V to test and take her on a long drive. Where to? We had no idea. We wondered if we should go to Yellowstone, "nah, too cold and parts of it might be shut." Then where? We wondered for about 15 more minutes. "California, of course," G and I suggested at the same time.

So we sat and stared at the map of United States for a few days, spoke with a few colleagues and friends. Many of them warned us against it, "the weather, the cold, the longness of the drive," they all said. G and I said, "We have drive from NJ to Wisconsin, from NJ to Dallas many times, and most of them in horrible weather. We are ready for it." Actually, we just hoped we were. I read through trip advisor, posted questions, got responses that also warned us against it. One of them suggested, take blankets and food for at least 3 days. We did all that, at least I did, G just smirked, "we will be fine," he reassured me. I questioned him, "how do we know? We have never been that-a-ways. Plus we have a little girl with us. If not for us, at least for her," I suggested as I dragged him to one Wal-Mart trip after another.

We thought we were all ready as we got closer to our trip, I was trying to wrap up work before the trip and so was G. Babs was counting the number of days she would be off while her classmates attended school before the December Holidays. We still had not decided the route to take and hence had no hotel bookings sorted out. We were going to wing it. The plan was to get to California, "how?" We had no idea. But that was the great idea and we were going to go through with it.

While doing the planning, a couple friend of ours decided to join us on our way back. So we sorted out the tentative dates, which eventually became final dates as we had others involved in the trip. Now the upward journey to California involved only the three of us but on our way back we were picking our friends up at Vegas. Now we had concrete dates, hotel bookings, and other fun things planned for that leg of the journey. In CA, G's cousin also made some bookings at a youth hostel next to a light house. The whole thing sounded romantic and we were getting excited by the minute.

The days neared and it was the Sunday before the Wednesday we were to leave on our vacation. Girish is coughing and complaining of mild body ache. On Monday he is bedridden with a high fever and I am starting signs of sore throat. On Tuesday he is on Tami Flu and I also get one prescribed because I can also feel the onset of a fever. That night the three of us went to bed at 7pm and woke up on Wednesday at 9.30am. The Tami-flu, the need and want of a vacation, and the Advil, cough syrups and other concoctions got us out of the bed. We were still thinking if it was a wise decision to drive with full blown flu for the two of us. And if you knew us you would know we are nuts, and so we decided to pack and leave. Since we were sick the last three days, not a thing had been thrown into the suitcase.

The next few hours, we answered work emails, tied up the few things that needed to be taken care, and started to pack. Once packed we ate some leftovers and just as we loaded the car fully G suggested that we pack some home made food for dinner. In swift South Indian movements I quickly made Curd rice and Puliyogare while G made potatoes. We were ready for the show...er...road.

To the Journey that took us through 8 American states where many a memories were made.

Love
Traveling ART

And then it was done...

When babies are small, they need you so much. So much that sometimes you want a break from being their mother, their caregiver, their one true need. After all the stress of work and baby, you are often wondering, when will my baby start doing things on her own...well...apparently now for my Babs girl!

By the time she was two she was off diapers, thanks to Pinky, her baby sitter. She started to eat on her own before she turned three and by the time she was four, eating out was not a challenge any more. She started to choose and wear her clothes, get her hair done and sometimes even make up done before she turned five. A few things left for me or G to do were her bath...this was a major ticket item, one that G and I fought over when we were tired...

This past Saturday a friend was coming home and our home was a mess. I was trying to clean up and G was helping me. Babs after playing outside was a mess and desperately needed a shower. G took her in, turned the tap on at the right temperature and told her to call him when she was soaked enough to get her lathered up...and completely forgot about it. Fifteen minutes later when I asked him if he had helped Babs finish her bath he stared blankly at me. Both of us rushed to our room to find a clean Babs, neatly dressed and doing her hair. "Now what else is there for us to do?" we both wondered.

It is true that every time your baby weans off a dependency a new one comes up. They are never going to not need you, at least that is the hope. I think I would be an emotional wreck if my girl told me that she was done needing me...But at the same time you make me proud every time you take on a new challenge.

Love
Your Amma

PS: Babs, you were showering the other day and you had secretly used your Papa's soap. When I wanted to cream you up, you begged me not to do that. I asked you why and you said, "I like the smell of Papa's soap, it reminds me of him, please do not take it away with the cream smell."

PPS: You sang for the first time on a mike at a karoke party! Now I am officially ready to go to a Karoke Bar with you...cannot wait!

Summer Cleaning...

My plans to clean the house took a backseat when compared to my Korean drama. My love for Korean drama has changed into my love for Korea and everything Korean. There are days when I look at my insufferable Samsung phone and still feel happy that I am at least owning one Korean product...similar to what my favorite actors hold in their hand in my favorite shows...I also regret not buying a Korean car...but that is not about to change now...I am just crazy...crazy for Korea. So any how, now I am back to cleaning the house and I made so much space. There is a lot more space available than before but strangely I have not gotten rid of many things, just displaced them and relocated a few. I am slightly freaking out that I might forget where I kept what but that it for the day when I will be searching for something. In the next couple of days, if you do come to my house, ask me to give you a tour of my closets :) I also started a knitting project. I wanted to knit a skirt for Babs but that took a wrong turn and got twice the size of what it needed to be, so I had to undo everything and re-start...should be done before next week took. I hope I get to do some painting too, that is one thing I have not done since Sanjana was born other than random ones here and there. The past long weekend, we vegetated in the house. Babs said something that sounded so like G, "I want to stay at home and relax, don't want to go out." Scared me and G...she also reminded G to take his own dishes away as she was not his servant (something she picked up from me). We also saw Chillar Party together and really liked it, now Babs wants to see it everyday... Today after picking Babs up from school, we waited in the pick up lane at pharmacy when Babs said, "ahhh, chincha." That means ,"ahhh, really" in Korean. And she also said, "ne, majeyo, (yes, that is right)" when I asked her if she did not nap in the noon. Makes me happy that my daughter loves to learn languages as much as I do. Right now, so smitten by Korean (hanguko)... And today when my car showed that it was 99 outside, I know for sure that it is officially summer, a little late but thanks for the most awesomest spring ever. I really hope that in contrast to last year, this summer is beautiful. Hopefully I start blogging and tweeting more often...I need to

What do you say?

Babs and I napped two hours this past Saturday. We were tired and crashed. G came to wake us up and get us ready for a movie we were supposed to go. He sat on the bed and started scratching (kujli-ing) Babs back softly...

Babs: Papa, aap kya kehna hai abhi? (What do you have to say now?)
G: (Super confused) Main kuch kehna hai?! (I have to say something?)
Babs: Thank you
G: What?! Why?
B: Because main aapko kujli karne diya (Because I let you scratch my back)

G stopped scratching her and we have been bugging her about it ever since.

Love
ART

Oklahoma! Ooklaahomaaa!

Randomly a couple of our friends and we decided to go on a road trip. It was decided over G's birthday night and in two days a cabin was booked, van rented and tentative plans were made. We were going to see Fall colors in Oklahoma!

The three and half hour ride had us singing songs, playing games and lots of laughs. The biggest giggle and shriek's came from us as we discovered each and every nook of the cabin we had rented. Of course we did get lost and took a lot of time to find it but it was worth the effort. The best part was that there were not many insects and all with it being Fall. I could walk around the property in the night under the stars without fear of having a cicada jump at me.

We grilled, we campfired, we hot-tubbed, we hiked a bit, we lazed a lot, cooked and ate a lot, played a lot, saw a lot of TV, and best of all, saw some of the most beautiful Fall colors. The drive through the Talamina State Park was amazing, even more amazing was observing two stick insects make out. First time I ever saw a stick insect (they are ugly!). We also tried to rescue a car that had gone off the path but then had to let the pro's do it.

We collected pine cones, dumped them in the water and saw the shrink, dried them to see them bloom again. Babs and I played silly games, we did each other's hair, cuddled a lot, Saw Aladin twice, ate on the swing watching nature sway around us. We also had our morning breakfast watching deers as they ran by and our cups of coffee while sitting on the deck contemplating life. The peacefulness of the place and the beauty of the nature was a definite battery charger for all of us.

We learned the Babs could do a sad slow walk, that she could say "booty-butt" and giggle away to glory. We made games out of "booty-butt" and of course we played rummy, and came second only to G, I hope it makes my FIL proud of me. We also sang Chappa Chappa Charka while we sat and saw the flames crackle on our bonfire.

Such vacations are good reminders as to why we need to take a break and do nothing and relax. When we got back, we were all sad  but once again the drive back into Texas was amazing. I could not take my eyes off the horizon, such beautiful colors, and the paints the sky threw at us was welcoming. It was all good and then the week started back for us...

Babs, you and I constantly cuddled on this trip. I smothered you and hopefully made up for all my bad moods in the past few work-stress induced weeks. Hopefully we will get to do this and more in the coming weeks once again.

Love
Amma

Thank You

Friday evening both G and I were home from work at 5.10pm. We had no plans for the evening and nothing scheduled. Babs was with Pinki, her baby sitter and had plans to go swimming with them. We were asked to pick her up after 7.00pm. G and I sat down wondering what to do with the free time. His tennis plans got shelved as his partner had other plans.

So guess what we did? We went and played tennis. The last time I played any tennis was more than two years ago. I was just so happy to be on the court. G indulged me and I had a ball but I could not stand under the Texan sun for more than 40 minutes. I retired-tired. It was about 102F that day and I am sure standing on the concrete court it was more than that. We were both sweaty and nasty when we got out and drove straight to a Starbucks. Another thing we had not done in maybe five years.

G and I sat down, had a cold coffee each chatting about our life so far, politics, Babs, future, random stuff and we finally got the call from Pinki letting us know that they were back home. We had finally spent some alone time together, it was about three hours in all but enough to charge us up for the rest of the year.

There are lots of things we learn from becoming a parent, one of those is appreciating the small ways in people around us help. If not for people like Pinki, Pooja, and Anitha then raising Babs while still working in a country where G and I have to do everything (cook, clean, fold clothes, etc) and with G falling sick as well would have been a nightmare. So, I want to thank everyone, my baby sitter's, my friends and family for making my life fun.

Thank You,

ART

25 cents

Usually people give you their two cents but my daughter gave her father 25 cents. She had found it somewhere in the house while playing with her cousin. She not only gives it to G but then tells him very seriously, "Papa, take this lot of money, go and take your friends at work out for lunch tomorrow."

G looks at the 25 cents, laughs heartily and tells her, "Sure Babs, will do that."

Babs nods her head and walks away to continue playing. G, me, her uncle and aunt all start laughing loudly, wondering how simple life would be if 25 cents was considered a treasure. All is forgotten after that and life goes on.

Next day, the three of us are sat in our favorite restaurant waiting for our food to come. Babs impatiently asks, "I want the yummy food now, where is it?" We explain to her that she has to wait, when a bulb goes off inside her head, "Papa, did your friends say thank you? Were they happy?"

"With what Babs?" G asks her bewildered.

"The 25 cents? Remember, did you or did you not take them out for lunch?" She remembered!

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I opened the door on her feet on the 4th of July. We were going to go out for a walk and I was distracted when I opened the door. The poor baby screamed her lungs out in pain. The noise the door made when it opened on her feet made my stomach churn. While she wailed, I cried. G who was taking a nap, bolted and was next to us in a second holding his baby tight in his arms. Babs saw me cry and G concerned that in a couple of minutes she calmed down as I tearfully bought a Dora bandaid to her. There was blooding flowing out fast but I knew that a bandaid would calm her instantly.

As soon as I wiped off the blood and got the band aid on her feet, she smile, touched my face and told me, "It's ok Amma, it was hurting a lot then. Now only a little. It will get better soon."

To make her feel better, we took her to a Desi store, ate Aloo Paratha and then went swimming. Oh BTW, did I mention that she is a swimmer now? A good one at that? She has not developed a technique to breathe yet but she is fearless in water now. From trying out free style to breast stroke and back stroke, she is ready to experiment. She is also big into diving now. I am so proud of her. After her swim, we cleaned up and while I was making my dinner, she came and stood next to me, "Amma, aap ko samaj mein nahin aata hai? Ek choti bachi door ke paas kadi thi aur aap uske payr ke upar door khol diya?"

She had such mock seriousness in her voice that G and I burst out laughing again.

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Love you a lot Babs,
Keep the cheer

Love
ART

Games we Play!

We are all settled into the mundane life of student-hood. Orientation and all that done and it was time for the "Swagat" celebrations which invite the newbies into town by the Indian Student Association. Swagat was combined with August 15th celebrations and we were all there at the flag hoisting. I ignored G completely the first time he saw me there. He was looking soooo cute (at least for me) but still I knew that he was the one who had irritated me a couple of days ago and hence I should ignore him.

He walked up to my roomie as we filed back into the building for intro's and asked her, "Why is she not talking?" and she was like, "I dunno, you ask her."

And we then we did the whole intro thing and then food followed by games. We played musical chair. G and his best friend from UG who also went to KSU stood at both ends to remove the chairs and keep the game going. I won. And he tried to talk to me but I was like "whatever," and kept cold shouldering him.

Until he could not bear it at all. He came home with N after Swagat was over and spent sometime talking with us three roomies. It was fun. We laughed a lot because G and N have a good sense of humor and he was trying to make friends with me. We made friends...

Cute Sardar

It was our first Friday in our own apartment. We were still getting used to the whole living without family stuff and my roomie and I decided to hit the bed early because we really had nothing planned. Around 12.30am it started. Loud foot banging noises from above. We had three Sardar's living above, of which one looked like a Greek God...awww...anyways...the Sardar's were drunk and having a party.

My roomie and I got mad. We took our brooms and tried to pound on our ceiling hoping they would hear but to no avail. Then we checked the door right across from ours and saw that all of them boys were gone and probably were at the party too. Then we went down and called G.

He was all groggy eyed but told us not to worry and that he would talk to the cute Sardar and help us get to sleep. And so we waited....

waited...

waited...

half hour and still it did not seem like the music or dancing would stop. Roomie and I climbed up the stairs and knocked the door...and guess what we saw...G with a beer in hand dancing bangda. He stopped half way his step and had the sheepish smile and told us, "how about joining the party."

ARRRRRGggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh...we requested cute sardar to not make noise as we wanted to sleep and it was already 2.am plus and headed down.

That was the last Friday in my two years at school when we slept at 2.00am. The rest of our KSU life we hardly ever slept on a Friday night.

Falling Lungi

When we moved in, we did not have phone lines yet. So my roomie and I went to G's apartment because the rest of the apartments were also filled with newbies and none of them had phone connection. I called home and everyone, told them I was safe and sound and moved in. After making the call I was heading up to my apartment when I saw G and friends standing and chatting on the mid-landing (remember he is in the basement and I lived on first floor but the entrance to our building was on the mid-landing). G was wearing a lungi that he had pinched off a fresher.

The minute he saw me, he told me, "run to your apartment fast. I don't know how long the lungi will stand without falling down and it might fall any minute now."

I gave him the WTF look and ran up stairs and then could not stop laughing. He was (is) super funny.

Shut Up!

Lock, stock and barrel, which equalled two big suitcases and some bedding that my brother had bought me, I moved to Manhattan, Kansas. G was nowhere to be seen. There were two new guys M and S who introduced themselves as the substitute housing co-ordinators when G was away on a vacation to Ohio. These guys showed me one crappy apartment/house after another. I was so mad at G that he had said one thing and had not done it and here I was with two sweet guys but no apartment materializing.

G was back in town and I met him briefly once in the food court and just exchanged plesantaries. He was busy with guys and I did not feel like talking to him because he had dumped me in regards to getting me the perfect apartment.

Then after using my Tamil influence with K4 (an senior student) I moved into the apartment K4 was moving out of. Which, as luck would have it was on the 1st floor diagonally opposite of where G's apartment was in the basement.

When all this was sorted out G came back. He told us that he will be with us through the signing the lease process and told us to meet him at our apartment-to-be around noon. My future roomies and I were there and so was G. He started chatting with us and I had a whole bunch of questions and kept shooting one after the other. Suddenly, G turned and looked into my eyes and pointed to his watch and said, "I am going to clock you, dont talk for another five minutes."

*silence*

I could not beleive that someone actually said that for me. I know I am very chirpy and talkative but no one has ever asked me to shut up ever before that and ever after that. I looked wide eyed at him and then got all sad and such. Embarrassed I held my peace nad kept quiet and from that moment on I hated him and decided that I will never talk to him again.

But as we all know, life has its own idea of what is to be and whats not to be...

Nine Years!!!

Nine years to the day G and I decided that we should start dating seriously. And guess how many days it took us to decide that after we met???? About 5-10 days approximately. G's and my saga is very funny. Actually, it is like a movie story, a cliched desi movie story. I will write about it in parts.

On August 5th, my brother and I decided to pay Kansas State (KSU) a visit so drove from Kansas City to Manhattan, Kansas where I was going to do my masters. I had spoken to a GS over the phone because he was listed as the housing co-ordinator on the Indian Student Association guide and he had told me to meet him at a certain location at a certain time (think it was like 4.30pm or something).

Brother and I were there but the hero was not. So we took help of other students around and checked out the campus and got preliminary paper work out of the way...and then we got back to where we were supposed to meet him. I sat in the living room of one K4 when G walked in. Looking so HOT (sizzzlinggggg) that I was for a second taken aback. I knew that he noticed me too.

He told me to move in and he would make sure that I would have a house ready to move in. I liked his confidence and all the charisma along with his good looks. Happy to see that KSU was not filled with pazham (fruit) material headed back home...

So that is how we met...

Rest in next...short post keeps it interesting...I think...what say?